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Sunday, October 23, 2011

Have You Seen This Man?

PGA officials are currently searching for this player, believed to be past his prime for several years. This photo was taken from a recent milk carton:

Missing golfer searches for fairway

The following information was released Saturday: Justin Leonard was ranked #23 in the OWGR in 2008, the last year that he won a trophy. Since then he has steadily fallen; he currently ranks a mere 281 in the world, bolstered by a massive .67 point average.

In 2008 he won one tournament and made 24 of 25 cuts. In 2011, he won a great deal of sympathy by making only 13 of 25 cuts. His 2011 scoring average isn't good enough to make the Top 10 on the LPGA Tour. And he has been missing for so long that, until Friday, he was unaware that he even had a PGA Tour card for 2012. (An unverified source secretly confirmed that officials hoped he wouldn't show up to claim it.) There has been no reason to believe that he would ever be seen again.

However, sightings of this missing player have been on the rise this week. It is believed that he has stolen Dave Stockton's favorite putter and fled to DisneyWorld with nefarious plans in mind.

Be on the lookout. If you see this man, please notify PGA officials immediately. It is believed he may attempt to steal the Children's Miracle Network Hospitals Classic trophy this very afternoon!

Wouldn't that be a Goofy finale to a truly unpredictable golf season?

The milk carton photo came from this page at zimbio.com.

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