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Monday, December 24, 2012

The Limerick Summary: 2012 Mayan Apocalypse

Winner: All those tired golfers!

Around the wider world of golf: There wasn't a wider world of golf. The world ended last Friday -- didn't you hear?

Charlie Brown Mayan parody

As there was no golf this past weekend, I figured I might as well take a look at the reason.

That's right. There was no golf this past weekend because of the Mayan apocalypse. Golf courses were empty, as nobody had a tee time. Why set a tee time when there would be no time? There might not even be any golf courses left!

And obviously, without fans to buy tickets and line the fairways, sponsors saw no need to put up prize money. Therefore, there were no pro golf tournaments on any major tour this week.

I was amazed to discover how quickly Wikipedia updated articles on the 2012 Phenomenon and the Mayan calendar to confirm that "Doomsday" was in fact a misinterpretation. A brief portion of the later article states:
Misinterpretation of the Mesoamerican Long Count calendar was the basis for a popular belief that a cataclysm would take place on December 21, 2012. December 21, 2012 was simply the day that the calendar went to the next b'ak'tun, at Long Count 13.0.0.0.0. The date on which the calendar will go to the next piktun (a complete series of 20 b'ak'tuns), at Long Count 1.0.0.0.0.0, will be on October 13, 4772.

Sandra Noble, executive director of the Mesoamerican research organization Foundation for the Advancement of Mesoamerican Studies, Inc. (FAMSI), notes that "for the ancient Maya, it was a huge celebration to make it to the end of a whole cycle". She considers the portrayal of December 2012 as a doomsday or cosmic-shift event to be "a complete fabrication and a chance for a lot of people to cash in."
Presumably none of us will have to deal with the uproar that may happen on 13 October 4772.

I decided that, since there were no tournaments this past week, I would use this Limerick Summary to expose the true significance of b'ak'tun 13. Consider yourself enlightened!
Those researchers made a mistake;
Rumors of our demise were a fake!
Here’s the deal: Ancient science
Made clear to the Mayans
That golfers would need Christmas break!
The picture came from comicsbeat.com.

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